This is How I Know I am Home:

1) My sisters and brothers still retain the ability of not cleaning the bathroom and inexplicably keeping empty shampoo bottles around, full of water, rather than recycling them. It's kind of like in that movie Signs where the little girl keeps glasses of water around and it saves them from the aliens, except my siblings aren't saving us from aliens, they're just plain weird.

2) There are a number of squirrels that live around our property. They do not cavort and play squirrelly games. They play games in which it looks like they viciously try to kill each other for setting foot on the wrong tree branch. We all just stay out of their way. They've been known to throw small objects at us.

3) There is also a pair of hawks that live in a tree next to our house. My mom feels that this is normal. It's not. She also feels that they could attack and kill the yip-dogs that live behind us. They might.

4) My dad showed us a few coats of arms from the history of the Leyde family. This might have been fun except that this is how they went:
Half blue and half yellow
Half blue and half yellow with some stars on the bottom
Half blue with a lion and some stars
Some stars and a bird
An angry bird killing another bird
A really rabid dog

The last one he pointed out as my grandmother's family. My grandmother is a crazy catholic hellion. I had to leave the room so no one would see me laughing quietly and hysterically.

5) My other grandparents, the non-catholic, ones, got two kittens. One is dark and patchy and is named Morrita, (or "little blacky"....oh god the originality) and the other is names Wesley. My grandfather refers to him as "The Minister". They are horribly cute and frequently climb the drapes, but my grandmother takes pictures rather than trying to get them off with a broom, which leads me to believe that my grandmother has been replaced by an alien and that perhaps my siblings have the right idea after all.

6) My own cat, Clawdia, has been friendly towards me, which leads me to believe that she has been replaced by an alien and that perhaps my siblings have the right idea after all.

7) My mom gave me a list of about ten different and huge home projects that I will apparently be in charge of. This leads me to believe that she for sure not been replaced by an alien.

I have to go sleep more. I got up at 8 to walk the dog, and ohgod that's early for me.